


nothing left of you and me

by quackingfish



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - BDSM, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Anal Sex, Collars, F/M, Femdom, Ice Play, M/M, Psychic Bond, Smut, Soul Bond, Trans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-05
Updated: 2014-09-27
Packaged: 2018-02-11 21:46:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2084286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quackingfish/pseuds/quackingfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Michael is a switch trying to locate his soulmate in a world of Doms and subs. Ryan is in the same boat (but not the same part of the country), and the non-verbal nature of the bond makes telling Michael damn near impossible.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. to the beat of the drums

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Unbound](https://archiveofourown.org/works/286147) by [Cesare](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cesare/pseuds/Cesare), [helens78](https://archiveofourown.org/users/helens78/pseuds/helens78). 
  * Inspired by [Bound to the Beat](https://archiveofourown.org/works/507720) by [dancinbutterfly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dancinbutterfly/pseuds/dancinbutterfly). 



> Title from Two Coffins- Against Me!  
> Chapter title from Die Young- Kesha  
> Takes place in the same AU as [Bound & Determined](http://archiveofourown.org/series/11026) and also [Bound to the Beat](http://archiveofourown.org/works/507720), which are both fantastic fics.  
> Little bit of brief background: this is a soulbond AU and _also_ a BDSM AU. Dom and sub are the two socially accepted orientations, though others do exist, and generally soulboned pairs are one Dom and one sub. People also refer to their soulmates with ey/em/eir pronouns until they learn the right pronouns.  
>  cw for briefly mentioned abuse of power/predatory behaviour by a teacher
> 
> EDIT 02/07/15: yeahhhhh so this has been left unfinished for like a year, sorry. still love this AU, but uh, whoops.

Michael sighed, spinning his pen between his fingers as he stared down at the form he’d just been handed by his Concordance teacher. The two checkboxes seemed to be glaring at him, the black lines almost intimidating. His eyes kept flicking back and forth between the two, his fist clenching under the table as he checked, not for the first time, that there weren’t any more boxes on the back of the paper.

Because unoriented people and switches like him didn’t exist, of course. How could he forget?

The person sat on his left glanced over when they heard the shuffling of his paper, rolling their eyes before going back to staring out the window, and Michael bit his lip, frowning and tapping the desk with his pen for a moment before stilling.

The small twinge in the back of his head let him know that ey had picked up on his mood, and Michael focused on sending em thoughts of reassurance, trying to tell em not to worry without words. He sighed, shifting in his seat and tugging the paper closer to him.

He _could_ write in another answer, _technically_ , but there was no way the school, or anyone, really, would accept that. For all the progress that people liked to talk about, shit still _really_ sucked down on the ground, on the front lines of this bullshit.

Hell, there was only one option out of the two that would ensure he ended up okay and didn’t have to take any abuse. Even subs tended to get shit on a lot, when there weren’t any switches around. Michael sighed, his shoulders slumping as he put a cross next to the only option with a capital fucking letter, the only one that was an actual safe choice, even though it made him shrink into his chair and want to throw up.

Of course, that earned him another wave of concern from the bond, a warm softness spiked with something sharper, which, knowing em, was probably a threat of violence towards whatever was making him feel this way. If Michael hadn’t been so fucked up, he probably would have laughed.

Even still, he sent em as much fondness and love that he could, ignoring the ache in his chest that seemed insistent on reminding him that ey wasn’t here, and might never be. Before he could get too wrapped up in it, though, his teacher started weaving back and forth between the rows of desks, gathering up all the completed slips of paper and occasionally humming at people’s answers. Probably planning who he would hit on the second they were legal, like a total scumbag.

 

Michael felt all wrong for the rest of the week, spending even more time than he usually did yelling at video games and ignoring all his homework. His soulmate’s worry increased steadily, until one day, when he was sat staring out of the bus window on his way home, he got a wave of frustration and distress from em.

Eir feelings were so achingly similar to Michael’s that he felt a flicker of hope that maybe ey were like him, maybe ey didn’t fit in the two accepted orientations, or maybe, just _maybe_ , ey was a switch too. And then the bus jolted to a stop, making him elbow himself in the stomach and bringing him back to the reality that ey was probably either a Dom or a sub and expected him to be their counterpart, and nothing more. He hated everything. Except for his soulmate, because he was kinda built to be in love with em and all, but still.

 

He found a fix on a Saturday night at a bar, though. Chatting with this red-headed toppy girl had been fantastic, and when she’d smirked at him and asked his orientation, he’d just grinned. She was totally giving off the vibes of a super awesome Domme, and Michael had been feeling pretty subby for the past day or so.

Meg lived conveniently close to the bar- so close that he almost forgot to send an apology/warning down the bond. They both fucked around with other people and were totally fine with that, but he knew that shit could get pretty intense (and fucking hot) even from the other side, so it had become habit to try to give em a little heads up.

Her hands tangled in his hair as soon as the door was closed behind them, and Michael bit back a tiny noise of pleasure as he met her eyes. “Okay, hold on- I can’t focus when you’re fucking-“ Michael grabbed her wrist, grinning.

“Shit, sorry.” Meg laughed in response, pulling away until Michael looped their fingers together. “Safeword?”

“Red. And- I want just sex with power exchange, yeah? Not really in the mood for other shit.” Michael shrugged, his eyes flicking up to watch her face. God, sometimes he hated how short he was, but the way she practically towered over him made his dick twitch in his jeans, and he surreptitiously rearranged himself.

“Oh, you’re a traffic lights kinda guy, huh? Okay, I can work with that. Shirt off.” Meg pushed his hand away and folded her arms across his chest as Michael hurried to obey, handing his shirt to her when she put her hand out.

“Oh, also- keep calling me Meg. I wanna save all that ‘Mistress’ stuff for my soulmate, yeah?”

“Okay, Meg.” Michael ducked his head, hooking his fingers in his jeans and waiting for Meg to give a little hum of approval before he tugged them down, cursing a little when he realised he’d left his shoes on. Meg laughed and ruffled his hair as he kicked his shoes, socks, and then _finally_ his jeans off and left them in a pile on the floor.

He glanced up at Meg again, and she just tilted her head and raised an eyebrow, so he shoved his stuff out of the way before sinking to his knees, wobbling slightly with the lack of practice that he had come to expect from himself.

“Good.” She said, voice low and quiet as it sent shivers down his spine. “Okay, take my panties off. I want you to get me off, and use your mouth, yeah? What’s your colour?”

Michael sucked in a breath, his hands sliding up her thighs and under the hem of her skirt. “Green- oh _fuck_ , so green.”

“Great.” Meg ran her fingers through his hair again, tugging after a moment. “Come on, hurry it up.”

Michael shuffled closer, pressing his face to her thigh as he pulled at the hem of her panties, working them steadily down her legs and struggling to fit them over his shoes, whining softly.

“Aww,” Meg laughed, patting his shoulder. “It’s alright, you can take them off. Be gentle with them, though- I like those ones.”

“I like them too,” Michael murmured, before the pressure of her hand on his bare skin and the floor on his knees shut him up and he went back to obeying her, making quick work of her shoes before gently setting them off to one side.

“Nah, I think you should go put them over there, by my others.” Meg nudged at his knee with her foot, before adding. “Also, you should crawl.”

Michael sucked in a breath, barely hesitating before falling forwards onto his hands and curling her shoes against his stomach. He could feel her eyes on him as he crawled towards her little shoe rack that had probably came from fucking IKEA, and something about it all made him shiver and clutch at his dick, just for a moment.  

“Is this good?” He kept his voice quiet and head low as he rested the heels next to a worn pair of sneakers.

“Yeah, well done.” Meg tapped her hand on her thigh, and Michael grinned, curling up a little at the sound of her voice and trying not to fucking preen. “Back over here, then- didn’t I give you something to do?”

Her tone was light and teasing, but Michael still hurried back to her with a speed that might actually bruise his knees, which would _definitely_ be fun later. Meg’s legs slid apart easily when Michael nudged his way between them, glancing up at her and biting his lip as he took in her flushed face and genuinely _incredible_ body. Fuck.

“Go on then, Michael. Make yourself useful.” Meg looped her fingers in his hair and pulled him in, humming when he pushed her skirt up and out of the way. It was so nice to just be put into place, and Michael couldn’t help moaning as he leaned in and pressed a kiss to her skin, resting one hand on her thigh as her tugging got more insistent.

“Michael,” She warned, shifting closer to his grip and opening her mouth again, cutting herself off as Michael leaned in and licked a long stripe across her, whining a little as she moaned before licking at her again. She kept quieter this time, and Michael frowned, pouting a little before focusing on her clit, gripping her hips and _already_ pulling out all the tricks he knew.

Michael teased at her with his fingers when she moaned his name, muffling his groan by mouthing wetly at her thigh before going back to flicking her with his tongue. Fuck, it was like the only thing that mattered was getting Meg off, because he was on his knees and she had told him to do something and was moaning and towering over him and-

And Michael just wanted so much to be fucking good for her that he practically ached with it. She gripped his shoulder and tugged him in closer, hips rocking against his mouth as she tilted his head up, making him feel so wonderfully used that he _really_ should have creamed his pants right then, if he’d actually been wearing pants.

Apparently it was the same for Meg, because she came after a second, her back arching with a loud moan as she clutched at Michael. He clutched at her just as tightly, though, whining when she pushed him away slightly with a breathy laugh.

“You did so good, Michael. Come on, bed?” Meg offered him her hand, squeezing his before tugging him up. Michael nodded, blinking rapidly and absentmindedly wiping a fist across his face, grinning when Meg met his eyes.

Meg went in front, walking at a pace that would’ve been painfully slow if he hadn’t got a flurry of emotions through the bond just then. Ey seemed to be laughing at him, sending him comfort and praise, and sending a bit of slight annoyance and frustration at the same time, and Michael couldn’t help grinning to himself and, even though he _knew_ that words wouldn’t get through, sending them a quick thanks and a promise that shit was about to get even better. 


	2. cloudless climes and starry skies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan has a history of helping people figure out their orientations with casual sex, so helping Gavin with his is practically second nature, as well as being fun as dicks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from She Walks In Beauty- Byron (so what the last one was from a kesha song fuk ur rules)

“So.” Gavin slid along the cafeteria bench, dragging out the word until Ryan looked up from his phone. “Ryan. Ryan the switch guy. Would you-“

“Sure.” Ryan cut him off, locking his phone and tucking it in his pocket, glancing at Gavin but not meeting his eyes.

“Wait, what?”

Ryan laughed when Gavin frowned, patting his shoulder as he spoke. “I’ve been out for a while now, Gavin. You’re not the first person confused about their orientation who’s come to me, asking to scene, to try something out.”

“Oh.” Gavin deflated a little, cracking his knuckles before perking up again. Ryan could see why he was confused about himself. He wasn’t one of those people who practically leaked their orientation all over the place with words and glances and posturing. Ryan tended to keep an eye on people like Gavin, and it had only helped him so far.

It was _probably_ an invasion of their privacy, but Ryan had kinda made a game out of it- noticing people and then guessing if, and when, they would ask him for this. Then again, they _were_ asking him for casual sex, which probably messed with the morality of like, everything.

(And then there were people like his soulmate. Ey felt so sure of emself and eir status most of the time, giving off an atmosphere of understated confidence often tinged with more than a little anger. And yet he had no fucking clue what ey was.)

“So. I think I want to try uh, subbing? To see what it’s like? I mean, I have a whole year left before I need to declare anything, but I’m trying to be less of a tosspot about this shit.” Gavin shrugged, making a noticeable effort to keep his gaze lowered as he spoke.

Ryan nodded, drumming his fingers on the table for a moment before realising that yeah, if Gavin wasn’t looking straight at him, he might have missed that. “Sure. We can negotiate in more detail beforehand, if that’s alright. I’m usually free Thursday evenings, after drama club.”

“I’ve been Free since I was born.” Gavin laughed, pouting when Ryan frowned. “Come _on_ , you prick- my last name’s Free, remember? _God_.”

Ryan sighed, raising an eyebrow. In all fairness, that hadn’t been the worst joke he’d ever heard, but it was much more fun to pretend like it had been.

“You suck. Okay, uh, yeah- Thursday’s good for me. Can we do it at yours? I don’t know if my parents would be around or not.” Gavin pushed onwards, clearly used to people just rolling their eyes at his jokes. Well, apart from those weird kids he usually hung around with, but _most_ people. People with chainsaws definitely counted as outliers.

“Okay, yeah. I have your number, right? I’ll text you my address later.” Ryan nodded, turning away from Gavin and slipping his phone out of his pocket. He stared at it for a second, almost getting reabsorbed in it before realising that he was being watched. “What- _Gavin_. That was your cue to leave.”

“Oh.” Gavin shrugged, swinging his leg back over the bench. “Sorry, I got distracted. You have nice arms.”

“Uh, thanks.” Ryan ran his fingers through his hair, not sure if he should blush or laugh. He was planning on doing neither, but a rush of warmth from the bond tipped the scale so that he ended up grinning and letting out a tiny laugh.

“Okay, yeah- see you Thursday, Ryan!” Gavin grinned, patting Ryan’s shoulder as he left. Ryan went back to messing with his phone, resolutely ignoring the loud crashing followed by a rather loud squawk.

 

“So, I was thinking that-“

“Woah, you have a ton of books!” Gavin laughed, bouncing on his heels as he took in Ryan’s room. Ryan sighed and rolled his eyes, pressing a hand to Gavin’s back and pushing him towards his bed.

“Yeah. Come on, focus Gavin- if you let me start talking about my books we’ll be here all damn night.”

“Oh, right.” Gavin grinned, spinning around to sit on the edge of Ryan’s bed, blinking up at him. “So, you were thinking? Bet that’s unusual.”

Ryan snorted, turning away to toss his bag in the corner and shrug off his hoodie. “Yeah. I don’t think anything too heavy is a good idea, but it’s gotta be enough to help give you a good idea of where you stand orientation-wise, so. I was thinking a bit of collaring, a bit of ice, I could fuck you- if you want?”

He sank to sit down about an arm’s reach away from Gavin when he finished talking, smirking as he flushed bright red.

“Oh- _yeah-_ yeah, that’d be top. Well, _you’d_ be top, more like. Also, do you have a leash to go with the collar? Because that sounds even better.”

“Yeah, I do. Third drawer over there should have it, if you wanna go look. Also- safeword?” Ryan added once Gavin had gotten up, pointing again at the drawer when he glanced back at him.

“Coal.” Gavin tossed the word back at him, letting out a tiny squeal when he opened the drawer. “ _Oh_ , _Ryan_ \- you have so much stuff! Oh, and this is so nice, holy balls.”

Ryan had intended to use the time to give his soulmate a little bit of a warning- he loved how they had both developed this system. Ey was still sending him a gentle wave of warmth to match his rush of pride earlier in drama, so it was easy to change the tone of their bond, even when he was distracted by Gavin. “Okay. Where did that one come from, if you don’t mind me asking? Seems pretty unusual.”

“Ah, it started out as a joke between me and Griffon- did you know her soulmate uses the same pronouns as mine! Ve/vir- aren’t they just like, the best? Like, what are the odds?”

“That’s pretty cool, actually. Which ones have you grabbed?” Ryan tilted his head, trying to see what Gavin was holding. “Oh, good- I really like the black collar. Feels really nice on your skin, you know?”

“Sweet.” Gavin grinned, flopping down closer to Ryan than before and handing the leash to him. “Like this, yeah?” He arched his neck, looping the collar around his neck before looking expectantly up at Ryan.

“Yeah- but hang on a moment, yeah? I forgot to grab the ice, sorry.” Ryan twisted his fingers in his shirt, grinning and relaxing when Gavin nodded. “I’ll only be a second- stay there, and don’t fuck with my shit?”

“Okay!” Gavin called as Ryan left the room, practically jogging before deciding that that would probably make him crash into stuff and end up taking more time. Ey sent him a bit of smug satisfaction at Ryan’s hurrying, clearly laughing at him.

Ryan returned the inward laughter, adding a bit of a “fuck you”, which was a bit dampened by the fondness he just couldn’t keep back. And _fuck_ ¸ ey was practically leaking satisfaction and was totally horny, and probably getting emself off by listening to what he was doing through the bond. _Fuck_.

Ryan let himself rest his forehead on the wall next to the freezer for a moment, laughing as he tried to steady his breathing. His Concordance teacher was totally right- his soulmate had an enormous effect on him, could work him up so easily even with the likely huge distance between him.

After a moment, Ryan reached in and grabbed the bowl of ice cubes that he had made in the morning, popping one in his mouth and chewing as he hurried back to his bedroom.

He had no idea what he’d been expecting, but it _definitely_ wasn’t Gavin hanging half off his bed as he tried to read the names of the books and games piled up on the nearest shelf.

Laughing, he said, “You know, that’d probably work better if you weren’t upside down. Just a suggestion.”

“Oh- Ryan! Hi!” Gavin chirped, flipping over so that he was lying on his front.

“Jesus,” Ryan laughed, setting the bowl on his desk, tugging his shirt over his head as he stepped closer to the bed. “Here, let me put that on you.”

He knew that most other doms would be more forceful about this, but Ryan wasn’t most doms, hell- he wasn’t even an actual dom, and he got the feeling that this tactic would suit Gavin better. Gavin hurried to sit up and press the collar into Ryan’s hands, somehow also shirtless, and Ryan grinned and nodded, adding a tiny “Good.”

Before he put the collar on him, Ryan cupped Gavin’s jaw, tilting his head up and humming when Gavin closed his eyes, leaning into the touch. He fastened the collar with a swift movement, careful to avoid contact with the joining spot as he checked the fit before reaching behind him to pick up the leash, letting it trail across Gavin’s arms before clipping it on.

“Strip.” Ryan wanted to say more, but kept himself quiet. Telling him how good he looked was unnecessary at this point, and it freed him up to shuffle his pants off, leaving everything in a pile on the floor and waiting for Gavin’s clothes to join them.

He kept his silence a moment later, when he nudged Gavin backwards, first pushing, and then using the leash to guide him to lie down. Ryan waited for Gavin to shove pillows around before he pushed his legs apart and knelt between them, grinning and giving Gavin’s cock a quick squeeze.

It was weird looking down at Gavin and projecting a bunch of heat and love and trust outwards, even if he had plenty of experience with separating feelings for his soulmate out from the person he was having sex with. It wasn’t that Gavin wasn’t attractive or relatively fun to be around, or anything, but still.

Ryan shook himself, muttering a quick, “Okay, yeah,” before reaching to pull the bowl closer and adding in a louder voice, “Ice now, yeah? Good.”

Gavin nodded, his eyes flashing open, and Ryan only smiled when he noticed he was being watched. He picked up one of the cubes and let it melt in his hand a little before dragging it across Gavin’s skin, biting his lip when Gavin shuddered and wriggled, clearly not sure if he wanted to move closer or farther away.

“What’s-“ Gavin mumbled, tilting his head up before Ryan leaned over him, tugging on the leash until he relaxed back.

“Just food colouring. Non-toxic, and it won’t stain. Just figured that colouring you up a little might be nice.”

“Make me a really pretty picture.” Gavin said, closing his eyes and arching his back when Ryan picked up another one, leaving a trail of light blue across Gavin’s chest.

“Sure,” Ryan smiled, leaning forwards to kiss his shoulder.

There was no real pattern to Ryan’s movements; he just traced invisible lines across Gavin’s body, glad that the ice slid straight over all the hair on his chest. Ryan was no artist, so it ended up looking like a huge damp mess, but Gavin seemed to appreciate it.

Although it was clear that he was nowhere near subspace, Gavin was _clearly_ enjoying it, his face turned into the pillow as he panted and rocked his hips up into empty air, gasping loud whenever Ryan tugged on the collar.

“Here-“ Ryan grabbed for his shirt off the floor, shrugging before balling it up and wiping Gavin’s chest down. “Roll over, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Gavin said, breathless as he turned over, knocking his knees into the wall even though it _should_ have been far enough away.

“I’ve got lube, so I’m going to prep you and then fuck you. Here, pass me that condom?” Ryan said, nodding when Gavin wriggled around enough to hand it to him. “Good boy.”

Gavin actually moaned at that, and Ryan said it again, grinning. Shit, that was pretty awesome. Ey seemed to like it too, the bond filling with heat and returned praise so strong that Ryan’s eyes snapped shut and he grabbed for his cock, just to steady himself.

Ryan took a moment to breathe and then uncapped the lube, slicking up his fingers and then pausing again. “You doing good?” He asked, slacking his grip on the leash while he waited for Gavin to answer.

“Oh my god, yes- fuck me. Don’t be a tease, _oh_.” Gavin’s voice was wrecked as if he’d just had Ryan’s cock down his throat, which was a really nice image, even if his notorious gag reflex made that one impossible. He wasn’t quite begging, but definitely eager, so Ryan pushed on.

Gavin took the first finger easily, and Ryan sucked in a breath before muttering some quick praise before working in another. “God, you’re _great_ at this, Gav.”

Gavin whined in response, twitching his hips towards Ryan’s hand. Ryan tightened his grip on the leash, judging it so that Gavin wouldn’t be able to ignore the pressure on the collar but it wouldn’t even come close to cutting off his air.

After a third finger, Gavin seemed more than ready, but Ryan kept going until Gavin reached around to wrap his fingers around his wrist. “Ryan, come on.” He said, his voice strangely level until Ryan curled his fingers inside him and made him groan.

“Okay, yeah, _shit_ ,” Ryan nodded, pulling his fingers out and letting go of the leash for a moment, hesitating before handing it to Gavin. “Here, hold onto this for me?”

Gavin took it with a grin, and Ryan tore open the condom, forcing himself to slow down before he rolled it on.

“Fuck-“ Ryan groaned, clutching Gavin’s hips as he slid in, vision blurring for a second as the feelings of Gavin tight around him and the waves of pleasure from the bond overwhelmed him.

“Ry _an_.” Gavin gasped out, his fingers going white with how hard he was gripping the leash. “P _lease.”_

Ryan nodded, moaning as he started to move, curling around Gavin’s back and slipping two fingers into the collar.

He _really_ wasn’t going to last long- Gavin felt so damn _good_ , and his soulmate was so fucking present in his head that it was a wonder he hadn’t already lost it.

So he slid a hand round to wrap around Gavin’s cock, sloppily jerking him off in time with his thrusts, mouthing at his shoulder to muffle his moans. Gavin groaned freely, arching his back and rocking against Ryan’s cock, thankfully nearly as close as Ryan was.

It was practically a fucking miracle, but Gavin came first- Ryan tugged on the collar, choking out “Good boy, you’re so fucking good-“ as he rocked deeper into him, and that was it. Gavin came in his fist, muffling his moan in a pillow and blindly flailing until he was clutching at Ryan’s forearm.

Ryan came practically a second later, not because of how amazing Gavin felt, though that drove him pretty fucking close, but because _shit_ , he had no idea what ey had done, but his whole body started feeling all tingly, starting at the joining spot and flooding down the rest of his neck to his back until he was groaning and coming hard.

“Holy shit,” Ryan panted, trying not to fully collapse onto Gavin and instead managing to flop off to one side, wincing as he slid out of him.

Gavin laughed, nodding, and watched with eyes half-shut as Ryan got rid of the condom and wiped his hand on a tissue. They just lay there for a little while, both catching their breath and, well, on Ryan’s side, at least, focusing in on his soulmate.

“So, that was pretty top.” Gavin spoke up after a while, looping the leash around his fingers before unclipping it.

“Yeah, it was.” Ryan laughed, pausing. “So, any more clarity with the orientation, then?”

“I. Yeah, I think so.” Gavin nodded, handing Ryan the leash. Ryan waited, flashing a glance at Gavin before realising that he wasn’t about to talk.

“You gonna share, or no?”

“Oh- _bollocks_ , sorry. Forgot.” Gavin smiled, and Ryan broke down into laughter before shutting up to let him continue. “I don’t think I’m like, an actual sub? I definitely like the collar, that’s great, but it’s more just, I dunno, the way it feels? More than me wanting to submit, or anything.”

“Fair enough. And would I be wrong in saying you seem to like being told you’re good, too? Because it sure looked like it from here.”

Gavin blushed, rubbing his face with a hand. “Yeah, I do. Really do.”

He lapsed into silence again after a while, then propped himself up and turned to face Ryan fully. “Do you- do you think my soulmate won’t mind? I wish I could ask vir, but.”

“I have no idea.” Ryan shrugged, sitting up and resting a hand on Gavin’s shoulder. “But, ve’s made for you, right? That’s kinda how it works. Like, _technically_ some people do block out the bond, but you are supposed to be a perfect fit.”

“Yeah. It’s just, I really like vir, so it would suck if ve was a total tosspot.”

“Yeah. I get that.”


	3. jack-o-lanterns in july

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "And enough of the heat seemed to be coming from the bond that maybe, just maybe, Michael was picking up on em being overheated or something. It could totally happen. Maybe."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from The Phoenix- Fall Out Boy  
> Sorry for the long-ass gap between updates on this, should be getting back to semi-weekly now!
> 
> mild cw for an unnamed character continuing to make advances after being turned down (think Jaune in Vol 2 but not pitied by the narrative. at all.)

Michael was fucking _sweltering_ in the middle of this classroom. Like, Jersey could get hot sometimes, later on in the summer when the grass was all brown and dead and kids would pop hydrants just to stay cool- but not like _this_ kind of hot.

_This_ felt like his skin was going to melt off and drip into a puddle on the floor, like he was running a fever and needed to get to the hospital, fast. The thing was- he was totally _fine_. He’d never actually heard about something like this happening before but- well, it didn’t make much sense, but- his soulmate lived somewhere to the west, from what he could tell.

And enough of the heat seemed to be coming from the bond that maybe, just maybe, Michael was picking up on em being overheated or something. It could totally happen. Maybe.

Whatever was causing it, it was fucking unbearable. Everything was sticky and stifling, and he kept being surprised when his skin didn’t actually cling to the chair, when his breathing came easy instead of catching in his throat.

The tiny, normally unnoticeable breath of wind from some dick at the back of the class tossing a paper airplane past him threw Michael entirely off balance. He was practically fucking _boiling_ , he had no right to be shivering and reaching for his hoodie as well. God, he was so hot that his bones felt like they didn’t fit right, like they’d grown two sizes overnight, and fuck if he wasn’t on edge.

Michael glanced back behind him, not quite restraining himself from glaring at the motherfucker with the paper airplanes. He could go screw himself, for all he cared.

 

Of course, of fucking _course_ , that meant the guy wouldn’t leave him alone.

“Hey man, you’re a sub, right? You’d totally be-“ He grabbed Michael’s arm, practically fucking leering down at him.

“No.” Michael rolled his eyes, shoving him off and trying to push off through the hallway.

“Aw, come on.” The guy kept pace with him, weaving through the crowd with a kind of awareness that Michael could never manage, nodding to a few people as he talked. “Guys can be subs too- I wasn’t trying to say you weren’t masculine enough or some shit. Just that I _know_ you’d look great on your knees-“

“Fuck off.” Michael’s voice rose and he rolled his sleeves up, wiping a hand across his face as if to get rid of the sweat that wasn’t even fucking there.

“Shit, sorry.” He laughed, and Michael glanced behind him, sucking in a breath when he saw he was still there. “Hey, can I at least give you my number? You don’t have to text me, but I’d like it if you did.”

“I’d like it if you fucked off,” Michael muttered, shoving his hand away and whirling to face him when he tried to shove the slip of paper back at him. “Seriously, fuck _off_.”

The guy raised an eyebrow at him, stepping forwards with this self-assured air that would have made him cower back against the lockers most days, but Michael was fucking _melting_ and furious and something inside him just _roared_ at the challenge. “Aw, come on baby, don’t be like-“

He reached an arm around as if to wrap it around his shoulders, and that was fucking _it_. Michael swung at him, biting back a growl when his fist connected with the guy’s jaw with a solid _smack_. He looked shocked, at first, before anger spread down his face like someone had poured a bucket of downright fury over him.

There was all this _space_ around him that there hadn’t been before, and then he couldn’t breathe and his stomach fucking _ached_ and Michael just lashed out again, stamping on the guy’s toe and swinging at his face again.

The thing was, Michael _knew_ he was a good fighter. It was kind of hard not to be when you were a skinny, angry switch kid- how the hell else would he have survived this long- but this guy was more precise and hurt like a motherfucker.

It didn’t help that Michael had to rise up onto his toes to get into his face, but at least that made him more mobile, able to duck out of the way of a good few of the punches he threw before offering him a knee to the gut, crashing against him and pounding his fists in before-

before hands gripped the back of his shirt and dragged him back, leaving him to collapse back against the locker and try to catch his breath. (On the bright side, now breathing was just as difficult as the bond made it feel.) One of the seniors who had grabbed him turned to face him, holding her hands out in a placating manner.

“Dude, chill. I’m _pretty_ sure you don’t want to get suspended.”

Michael sighed, letting his head drop down as he listened to the other two Seniors say basically the same thing to the other guy. If he was honest, he wasn’t quite sure why he’d thrown the first punch anymore. _Fuck_.

 

The bruises were nice, though. He got into enough ridiculous, _needless_ fights that Michael was nearly always covered in bruises, purple splotches stretching over his bones, patches of vibrant red and dull, faded yellow that meant the way he held himself was always shifting, adapting to each new pain as he went.

His skin was all- _colourful_ \- and it was so, so easy to push his blanket out of the way and trail his fingers down his chest, ambling around the edges of the deepest purple bruises and sending a small nudge through the bond, smiling when he felt eir presence in the bond grow.

Michael bit his lip, shoving his boxers down his thighs and arching his back against the mattress before sinking back down, shuffling until the throb in his neck was barely noticeable. He could feel a little jolt of interest from em when he reached to circle his cock with his hand, humming softly and turning his face into the pillow.

Ey _definitely_ was interested in this. A new kind of heat was rushing through the bond, less raw and more controlled, gentle, even. Michael grinned at the wall, starting to stroke himself with long, drawn out movements, rolling his shoulders as he got into it.

Having em in his head felt so damn good, and Michael revelled in it, sliding his hand up his cock with the rhythm that pulsed through the bond, making his joining spot hum and send flurries of warmth all down his neck.

He rolled his hips into his hand, biting down on his lip to keep back a groan. They never really got that many chances to _do_ this together- or, as together as they could be- and every other time one of them had taken clear control.

It was hard to describe, the way the beat of the bond would make his knees ache to hit the floor or the way he would rise over it all, careful not to make himself unwelcome in eir head but assuming control anyways. (He had _no_ idea what eir orientation was but it seemed to be at least relatively compatible, apparently.)

But this was distinctly different- not _equal_ ; they were always equal despite what role Michael felt himself assume, but there was no real exchange of power, just rough thoughts and emotions and fuck, it felt so damn _good_ , all of it. He was so, _so_ glad that the bond wouldn’t fade over time; he wanted to feel this way for _ever_.

Michael’s chest was heaving and he was barely even aware of his surroundings any more, but he managed to let go of his cock for a heartbeat, just long enough to flip himself over and shove the covers down to his waist. His face was pressed into his pillow, making it slightly harder to breathe, but the slide of his cock in his fist was just that much better.

And fuck, he was getting so close, and ey was sending so much warmth and tenderness through the bond and ey just felt so fucking amazing, it wasn’t even _fair_.

Squishing his face into the pillow, Michael arched his back and stuttered out a muffled moan. He pulled one of his arms up, trailing his fingers up his neck closer and closer to the joining spot, hips twitching erratically into his fist as he passed his fingers across it, imagining it was eir fingers as ey-

and that was fucking _it,_ Michael came and his world exploded and a million other clichés because he just didn’t have the fucking _words_ to express how damn good everything felt.

He curled over onto one side, bringing his knees up to his chest as he closed his eyes and focused on the bond, shivering and biting back another moan when ey burst into bright points of pleasure- fuck, ey’d totally just came. Fucking _awesome_.


End file.
